Surrender

Over the weekend N. took G. out for an oh-so-very-much needed daddy/daughter date. They went to campus and fed the ducks, she ran around on the quad, much fun was had by all (especially mommy who was sans G. for the first time in 22 days). At the end of their outing N. had the misfortune of experiencing one of G.'s more significant car seat related meltdowns which are typically reserved for me. She doesn't actually hate her car seat or riding in the car at all and is perfectly happy once she's been strapped down. What she hates is the moment when we transition from climbing into the backseat and moving around her car-safe toys to actually beginning to restrain her. She hates to surrender. She's been a feisty, strong willed personality from the very beginning and we absolutely cherish her spirit but moments like these challenge us as parents. How do we help her recognize when it is appropriate and safe and healthy to surrender? N. and I had a good laugh over this one because we both know it's all me. There is nothing I hate more than to surrender, too. I was quick to make the point that it must be an innate characteristic since she surely didn't learn it from me by 14 months and so maybe he could cut me some slack?? Really, though, this has been at the heart of all of the struggles in my faith life and in my marriage as far back as I can remember. There are two wills to which I would like to submit myself on a regular basis and in neither relationship does it come easily. The good news is that the very best thing I can do for G. is to model the behavior myself, to talk about the struggle, the beliefs that make me want to surrender and why it feels meaningful when I do. As for me, continued prayers and conversations and availing myself of the sacraments make it a little easier to unhook from my pride, take a deep breath, and choose let go. And I know the more I do, the more she will and, without breaking her spirit, I suspect the battles will slowly subside. I also bought a box of animal crackers to keep stashed in the backseat ;)